Have you ever judged someone?
Most of us know it's not a good idea to go running around, thinking that we're better than everyone else. But it seems quite possible that the reverse can be true about us.
Have you ever examined your life and wondered why everyone else is better than you?
It's a rather puzzling line of thought to take. Why do people like me? At first glance, the answer might be tricky to uncover. If you ask other people, sometimes they won't be able to tell you why. After all, how often do you look at someone and make a conscious decision that from now on, you are friends?
Most friendships, it seems, develop from circumstances. Perhaps you have the same group of friends or similar interests and hobbies. Maybe, you attend the same church group or chess club. However, in my experience, friendships don't just appear. They take time to mature and solidify. It's not always a good idea to pour out your heart and soul the very day you meet.
But there's often many reasons why we ask ourselves that question. Why does anyone even bother to take an interest in us?
We think we're not clever or smart enough. We think we aren't good-looking, talented, funny, or even likable. We scour our mind asking why anyone would spend the time listening to our stupid puns or pitiful remarks.
But when we do that, we're dismissing the friendship and our friends. Friendships are not something we earn. Can I repeat that?
Friendships are not something we earn.
A friendship should never come with a price tag. If you have to somehow "measure up" to their criteria, then that's not a friendship worth having.
Friendship is a gift. The fact that someone has given it to you is answer enough. As far as I know, most sincere individuals don't become friends with someone they despise. The reason people like you is because you're you.
It's not because you're talented or tell good jokes. That you can draw or write pretty well. That you're good at dancing or anything.
You matter to them because you make a difference in their life. And it's a good one.
Just stop with the questions, the doubts, worries, concerns. Just stop. Turn your focus outwards, stop worrying about yourself. In my opinion, all of this self-degrading introspection is an inverted form of self-interest. There are so many better things to think about, so many better things to actually do.
If we truly want to become a better friend, there are plenty of things we can strive for. None of them includes excessive worry about our self-image. It seems the more we reach for affirmation from others, the less likely we're going to get it.
In the end, we're no better or worse than anyone else. No one deserves to have a friend, any more than we deserve God's forgiveness. However, by grace of His love, we're all given an inherent dignity ingrained into our very being.
Just by virtue of being yourself, you are immeasurably valuable. We all have the potential to become a truly stunning image of God, both in fact and by example.
It's only in Him that we discover the true source of our worth. It doesn't come from how many friends you have, what talents you have, or where you live.
In Him, you find beauty and become beautiful. In Him, you find love and you become loveable. In Him, you find peace.
If you ever find yourself wondering why people would like a person like yourself, don't look in the mirror.
Look at the cross and let your worries cease and your heart find peace.
You are priceless.
Not knowing if someone likes you, or just tolerates you, can be the worst. But you summed up perfectly, but (in my opinion) without enough emphasis, the fact, There should be no price tag on a relationship. If there is, there is something wrong.
ReplyDeleteThis perfectly sums up what I am going through, as do many guys. I honestly can't say how it works for girls, certainly there will be one that can give me that answer.
What a beautiful reminder...thanks so much for this encouraging post!! ^_^
ReplyDeleteWell that was super inspiring and well written and JUST DARN MAN HOW THIS IS SO GOOD
ReplyDeleteWow, great post! I wonder those things often. :/
ReplyDeleteThanks for posting this! I needed to read this. :)
Wow, great post. I really needed this. :)
ReplyDeleteNice piece, Thomas, and very, very true. Yahweh says that every member of the 'church' (Body of the Lord, all of His followers...) have their place. No gift or calling or piece is better or more important. We are all God's, and He loves each of us.
ReplyDeleteBut now hath God set the members every one of them in the body, as it hath pleased him. - 1 Corinthians 12:18
We each have a part, a purpose. ♥
YHVH bless!
-Angela | thepeculiarmessenger.wordpress.com